Facebook Song

Once upon a time I read books and magazines
Then along came email, I thought that was pretty keen
I got on some good listservs, that was pretty neat
It was all so interactive, I was in the driver’s seat
Then along came social media, that’s when I lost my shit
Now there just wasn’t time for anything else to fit

Facebook, Facebook, what else is there to do
Facebook, Facebook, sit and watch me spew

I feel like I’ve lost perspective, I don’t know where I’m bound
I just gotta see what’s happening when I hear the sound
Of somebody responding to my latest post
Maybe someone even shared it, then I’ll have to post a toast
Hey that wee baby is the cutest little tyke
I’m gonna have to take a moment to click another “like”

Facebook, Facebook, I think I lost the plot
Facebook, Facebook, it’s the only one I got

There’s a drunk out in the alley, I think he’s getting sick
The cat’s playing with the garbage, I’ll have to take a pic
My friends and I once met, drank coffee and ate scones
Now we meet at the cafe and stare down at our phones
We can stop to post a selfie to show we’re all sitting there
If we talk we might miss out on something someone shares

Facebook, Facebook, just gimme my news feed
Facebook, Facebook, it’s all the news I need

They say it’s a revolution but I’m not sure that’s so
I didn’t need an app to find out what I needed to know
They didn’t need the internet in 1848
When they rose up around the world without a single status update
Maybe that’s a straw man, or maybe it is not
Maybe there are better tools than the ones we’ve got

Facebook, Facebook, I’ll get up off this chair
Facebook, Facebook, just got one more post to share
Facebook, Facebook, I’m not trying to be crass
Facebook, Facebook, someday I’ll get back off my ass

“Facebook Song” will appear on the 2015 album, The Other Side.

I use Facebook because everybody else does, and if you want to communicate with people, it can be hard to do these days without a Facebook account. It also is very attractive in lots of ways. Or at least social media is, in general. The fact that Facebook is a large, for-profit corporation, and can change algorithms or do whatever else they want, and thus impact how hundreds of millions of people perceive the world, is scary. But the song is more just about the basic phenomenon of Facebook in particular and social media in general, and how although there are many cool as well as addictive things about it, it has overall had a negative impact in many ways, in terms of encouraging people to spend more time on activities that are basically not very productive — very fleeting, shallow, superficial kinds of things. There is a dramatically increased tendency toward narcissism. While the world is brought together in some ways, there is also the tendency for the same kinds of insular cliques to form as usual — just on a larger and more superficial scale. But yeah, I use it every day, too. I’m not above this shit, and life is very contradictory. But I can still have opinions about this thing that increasingly dominates so many of our lives.

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